Small Steps
Hiya friends.
I had to discard what I wrote earlier because I am struggling with what it means to be creative while a genocide is happening. This newsletter was meant to share my creative discoveries while mothering three children. However, what started as learning about Palestine has become a bigger awakening about all the other atrocities around the world and then back to my privilege. A giant realization that what is happening there is happening because of us and this lifestyle we all enjoy in the West. Someone out there is paying for this privileged life. I just didn’t know it. Or maybe I didn’t what to think about it. But this live broadcast of genocide has made it impossible to ignore the realities and so now what? What the heck shall I do? What can I do more? Do I continue pretending I didn’t know? I have called my congresswoman for the past six months and gone to protest / ceasefire resolutions and reposted on my social media. What else am I supposed to do? What is my role? I mean does it even matter what I do? But then I remember that I am a settler! Yes, sure a daughter of refugees and immigrants but a settler on the indigenous land. So then what does it even mean to live a meaningful creative life while witnessing and actively participating in most of these genocides? How can I write about my creative journey and my privileged motherhood experiences? It just feels so out of touch honestly!
I remember whenever I talked to my grandparents, my parents, and other elders about the Partition of India and Pakistan in 1947. Among many horror stories, there are always stories of bravery and heroism. I don’t mean from famous freedom fighters heroes but small acts of kindness from a ‘neighbor that we didn’t know well’, ‘stranger in the train station’, or ‘passenger in the same bus’ kinda heroes. I am so fascinated by these unsung heroes. Their small acts of kindness changed the life of another person. The world had to change just because a small group of people decided ‘Nope! we are doing something different.’ I mean we don’t have to look back really. What started with 70 students in Columbia has now taken over the world. I am in awe of the GAZA solidarity encampment camps! in our school campuses and now around the world. These kids are teaching us what it means to be a hero, to do what’s in their power, to think beyond themselves, beyond what is convenient, beyond their careers, and to what kind of world is possible.
This gives me hope. This gives me light and direction to follow. Life keeps bringing me back a lesson, ‘Small steps’. I don’t need to make giant changes, just what is in my power. I can not undo so many of my past decisions that I regret. I am just trying to take small steps to change my current reality and hope for a better collective future. I am being very conscientious of where I spend my money. Last month I moved my web service from Wix to Squarespace. It is not a giant step but hopefully a correct one. I encourage you to do the same. Don’t feel disheartened. Just keep moving forward one small step at a time.
Below are images of a personal project I am working on. I have been experimenting with collage and really find it therapeutic. Here is some unfinished work. I am illustrating the poem WE by Ghayath AlMadhoun. I love his work and keep coming back to this poem.
xoxo
Sumayya
Wow, Sumayya. I am buoyed by what you shared. Thank you for the reminder of small steps. And your collage work paired with poetry is exquisite, powerful, wow!! Keep on in your small steps. You are making a difference, we will do so—together. Love to you.